Dr. Mittens' Feline Food Reviews: Soybean Edition

The Verdict 🐾

After rigorous research (and a bit of napping), I, Dr. Mittens, declare the soybean a safe choice for humans. Yes, you read that right! No toxicity here, so I give my enthusiastic paw of approval. But, let's be real, humans, you could still do better.

The Taste Test

Now, why might a curious kitty like myself consider nibbling on this legume? First off, those little green pods look suspiciously like toys. I mean, they could wiggle! And they’re about the size of a tiny ball—a perfect candidate for a good pounce! I can just imagine the fun of batting one around the living room. Alas, I am aware that my refined palate finds the appeal lacking. But if a cat were to munch, it might be out of sheer curiosity or mistaken identity!

The Puke Factor

Fear not, dear humans! Should a cat accidentally indulge in a soybean or two, the consequences are mild. Expect nothing more than a rapid expulsion of lunch—possibly mixed with a furball or two. But let’s be honest, if a cat chooses to regurgitate something, it’s probably just showing how it feels about your last dinner choice!

Human Instructions

To my human servants: Allow this to remain! The soybean is not a foe; rather, it’s a harmless little green invader. Just don’t expect me to join you for a salad anytime soon. I have standards, after all.