Rice

The Verdict 🐾

Ah, Rice. A delightful grain that humans seem to adore, and guess what? It’s safe for us feline scholars! Yes, my dear humans, you can breathe a sigh of relief; I, Dr. Mittens, hereby approve this harmless morsel. Though I must say, your obsession with this little grain is quite perplexing. How can you eat something that doesn’t wiggle, squeak, or look like a delightful feather?

The Taste Test

Now, let’s ponder why a curious cat like me might be tempted to nibble on this starchy substance. First, it’s small and round, resembling those delightful little balls you toss around for my amusement. And let’s face it—when I see you scooping it up, it almost looks like a game! But the real reason? I believe it’s a clever scheme by you humans to lure us into thinking it might come to life when it rolls away. Spoiler alert: it doesn’t!

The Puke Factor

If a brave kitty does decide to indulge in this grainy delight, the outcomes are rather predictable. Expect what I like to call a “rapid expulsion of lunch.” That’s right! Your precious rice could lead to a rather dramatic scene involving a surprise eruption from the belly—a veritable fountain of feline regret. Let’s just say, it’s best to keep the rice where it belongs: in your bowl, not ours!

Human Instructions

Dear human servants, as you stand in awe of my feline wisdom, allow this grainy companion to remain within your pantry. It’s safe, but just remember: it’s not for us whiskered wonderers! Keep it out of reach, and maybe save a few shrimp or chicken bits for a proper show of appreciation.